I’m about a glass and a half of wine in…preceded by roughly 6 cups of coffee throughout the day. It’s possible I might not make it to tomorrow at this rate. I’m not nervous so much as amped up. It’s a good stress, but stress nonetheless. This is the absolute PERFECT time to post on my blog, clearly.

Tomorrow, after 172 days of oral immunotherapy, increasing from the tiniest of tiny peanut doses up to this week’s dose of 12 peanuts, twice a day, my son will eat the equivalent of 24 peanuts at once….and he will be ok. His body has worked hard, nearly as hard as his mind, which is preprogrammed to avoid his life-threatening food allergy and it has conquered. Tonight he even got peanut butter on the side of his mouth and didn’t break out in hives. As late as last week, that was still happening even though he was eating 10 peanuts twice a day.

Tomorrow will mean my son is safe. He will be free. He will be able to be a 6 year old boy (at least for a few weeks as his birthday is rapidly approaching) and not the peanut allergy kid. He wants to go to sports games and eat the cake at birthday parties and I will let him and I, too, will be free…I will stop worrying. He will keep meds and his Epipen on him always, but I will not sit on top of the phone every second he is at school and out of my care. I’ll let him go to a friend’s house after school and not grill the mom on what he can eat or not eat. I won’t go to the playground with a package of wipes on the off chance a kid with sticky PB&J hands just played there.

A year ago I was just learning about OIT. Tonight, my son is on the brink of freedom from the allergy that held him hostage in his own body. Not all of it has been easy. We did have to move 600 miles away…away from my husband and all our friends…but what we have gained has been immeasurable and the friends we have made will be lifelong. I wouldn’t change any of it for the world.

Send up a prayer for us!


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